www.baby-ventures.za.net

Recommended Reads

CHILDREN BOOKS: FIRST IN SA HISTORY

Bedtimestories:
First Tile: Martin's Coming Home
Martin's Coming Home is a story about a new-born baby (Martin) which is brought into the world by his two lesbian mothers. The book focuses on the welcoming of Martin to his new home by his family. The theme of Martin's Coming Home is that of the love which his parents have for him, and his acceptance into the world as a new-born baby by his family.

Bedtime Stories is the first series of South African books written for children with same-gender parents. The story books explain to children that their family is just as normal as the next, and that they can be proud of where they come from.

The first series of books, My Family Series, aims to provide same-gender parents with story books that they can spend time reading to their children. The books are written in such a way that they are easy enough for a child to understand, but at the same time instil excellent values in the mindset of the child about their gay or lesbian parents.

In today's generally homophobic society, it is imperative that children with same-gender parents have a solid foundation of pride that their parents are just as normal as any other parents. Children need to know that whether their parents are gay or straight, black or white, or even multi-racial, that they are still loved very dearly by their parents.

The Bedtime Stories: My Family Series is not only for children with gay or lesbian parents - even children with hetrosexual parents can benefit from the story books. Children with hetrosexual parents need to be exposed to the fact that we live in a very diverse world, and by doing this children learn not only respect, but also love for others, regardless of the sexual orientation of their or other children's parents.

Also See: Benefits of Reading To Your Child

RESEARCH/EDUCATIONAL BOOKS

Buying Dad: One Woman’s Search for the Perfect Sperm Donor. By Harlyn Aizley
This is a very funny autobiography of a woman and her partner’s quest to have a baby. They explore various options, including asking a couple friends to be donors, before deciding on going the anonymous donor route. If you have been through this process, or are contemplating going through it yourself, you are sure to recognise many aspects of your own journey. It is a humorous and reassuring read.

Confessions of the Other Mother: Nonbiological Lesbian Moms tell all. Edited by Harlyn Aizley
This compilation of short stories is written by nonbiological lesbian moms. Some have chosen not to carry, others cannot carry due to fertility problems, and others hope to carry next time round. Each story attempts to come to terms with a role not defined in society. From what to call yourself as ‘the other mother’ to issues inside and outside the relationship, this is an eye-opener and one of the few books out there that recognises issues unique to the nonbiological mom.

The Complete Lesbian & Gay Parenting Guide. By Arlen Istar Lev
This is a solid handbook written by a family therapist with 20 years experience working with alternative families. She explores the emerging diversity of LGBT families, options for becoming parents, single parenting, coming-out, and infertility, as well as addressing issues such as coping with colic and finding time for adult intimacy. This book is sprinkled with personal accounts from parents who’ve been there before. It focuses more on younger children and babies than on teenage parenting.

The Ultimate Guide to Pregnancy for Lesbians. By Rachel Pepper
The new edition of this book is packed with even more information than the first and really is a great resource for people just starting out on deciding to become parents for the first time. It answers the questions: am I (are we) ready for kids? Can I do it alone? How to choose a donor? What is it like trying to get pregnant? What are my options if I don't get pregnant quickly? How will I handle being pregnant? What kind of birth do I hope for? What is it like for the non-bio mom? What kind of family will we be in those early days? A great starter read.

For Lesbian Parents: Your Guide to Helping Your Family grow up happy, healthy and proud. By Suzanne Johnson & Elizabeth O’Connor.
This is a great book written by two PhD psychologists who focus on the emotional and psychological aspects of lesbian parenting. It explores issues that are unique to lesbians as parents, including gender role development. It also looks at the impact having children can have on a relationship, and how to deal with friends and teachers regarding your unique family. There is an exploration on each phase in your child’s development until the teenage years. There is also a section touching briefly on the different options available to lesbian women wanting to start a family.

Our Story. Published by the Donor Conception Network. The book is written for children conceived by sperm donation into a lesbian parent household. It is illustrated by children and basically explains the child’s conception - how two mommies really wanted to have a baby, and then went to a doctor who helped them have a baby. This is a great little book to give to young children who have started asking questions about where they come from.

Book Reviews: Susan Newham (Journalist)

Above mentioned books available at the GLL Library at Wits.
GLL, P O Box 274, Wits, 2050
7th Floor, University Corner, East Campus, Wits University
011 717 1483 (w)
www.gala.wits.ac.za
(click on library)

MORE BOOKS: Recommended by Welfare Information Gateway

Children's Books for Gay and Lesbian Parented Families

Bosche, S. (1981). Jenny Lives with Eric and Martin. London, England: Gay Men's Press.
Dahl, J. (1989). River of Promise. San Diego, CA: Luramedia.
Elwin, R., Paulse, M. (1990). Asha's Mums. Toronto, Canada: Women's Press.
Heron, A., Meredith, M. (1991). How Would You Feel If Your Dad Was Gay? Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Newman, L. (1989). Heather Has Two Mommies. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Newman, L. (1991). Gloria Goes to Gay Pride. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Newman, L. (1993). Saturday Is Pattyday. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Schaffer, P. (1988). How Babies and Families Are Made: There Is More Than One Way. Berkeley, CA: Tabor Sarah Books.
Willhoite, M. (1990). Daddy's Roommate Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Willhoite, M. (1991). Families: A Coloring Book. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Willhoite, M. (1993). Uncle What-Is-It Is Coming To Visit. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.

Bibliography of Books for Gay and Lesbian Parents

Barrett, R. L., Robinson, B. E. (1990). Gay Fathers. Lexington, MA: Lexington Books.
Benkov, L. (1994). Reinventing the Family: Lesbian and Gay Parents. New York, NY: Crown Publishing.
Berzon, B. (1988). Permanent Partners: Building Gay and Lesbian Relationships. New York, NY: Penguin Books.
Bozett, F. (1987). Gay and Lesbian Parents. New York, NY: Praeger.
Burke, P. (1993). Family Values: Two Moms and their Son. New York, NY: Random House.
Corley, R. (1990). The Final Closet: The Gay Parents' Guide for Coming Out to Their Children. Miami, FL: Editech.
Curry, H., Clifford, D. (1991). A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples. Berkeley, CA: Nolo Press.
Gantz, J. (1983). Whose Child Cries. Rollings Hills Estates, CA: JALMAR.
Gil De Lamadrid, M. (1991). Lesbians Choosing Motherhood: Legal Implications of Donor Insemination and Co-parenting. San Francisco, CA: National Center for Lesbian Rights.
Hanscombe, G. E., Forster, J. (1987). Rocking the Cradle. Boston, MA: Alyson Publications.
Hidalgo, H., Peterson, T.L., Woodman, N.J. (1985). Lesbian and Gay Issues: A Resource Manual for Social Workers. Silver Spring, MD: NASW.
Johnson, S. (1990). Staying Power: Longterm Lesbian Couples. Tallahassee, FL: NAIAD.
Lewin, E. (1993). Lesbian Mothers. Ithaca, NY: Cornell University Press.
Macpike, L. (1989). There's Something I've Been Meaning to Tell You. Tallahassee, FL: NAIAD.
Martin, April. (1993). The Lesbian and Gay Parenting Handbook. New York, NY: HarperCollins Publishers.
Morgen, K. B. (1995). Getting Simon: Two Gay Doctors' Journey to Fatherhood. New York, NY: Bramble Books.
Pies, C. (1985). Considering Parenthood: A Workbook for Lesbians. San Francisco, CA: Spinsters/Aunt Lute.
Pollack, S., Vaughn, J. (1987). Politics of the Heart: A Lesbian Parenting Anthology. Ithaca, NY: Firebrand Books.
Rafkin, L. (1987). Different Daughters: A Book by Mothers of Lesbians. San Francisco, CA: Cleis Press.
Rafkin, L. (1990). Different Mothers: Sons and daughters of lesbians talk about their lives. Pittsburgh, PA: Cleis Press.
Rothblum, E., Cole, E. (1989). Loving Boldly: Issues Facing Lesbians. New York, NY: Harrington Park Press.
Schulenberg, J. (1985). Gay Parenting: A Complete Guide for Gay Men and Lesbians with Children. New York, NY: Doubleday.

Published on: 2006-07-31 (768 reads)

[ Go Back ]